It's been official for over a month now - I'm a Former Jesuit Volunteer. In the spirit of being "ruined for life", however, I've decided to continue my (less-than-frequent) blogging activity. It's a new chapter, but the same book...same Author of Life filling in the pages.
In addition to being an FJV, I'm now also a first-year medical student.
When I was trying to discern whether or not entering medical school was the right step to take after JVC, one of my greatest fears was that pursuing a medical degree would be all about following my will at the expense of God's. I was afraid I would get caught up in the intellectual excitement and the academic prestige of it all and lose sight of what is really most vital in my life.
Fortunately, as is usually the case, medical school turns out to be a both/and, not an either/or, situation.
The resources and opportunities in medical school are amazing - it's been a little bit like a science and medicine playground :) I've loved the self-directed learning environment, the synergy between seminars and problem sessions, the welcoming faculty, and the multitude of paths that seem open to us. I've been thinking about specialty choices, Master's degree options, research projects and service opportunities. There is no shortage of things to keep me busy!
But intertwined with all of these exciting developments has been that constant pull towards God. I come across reminders every day of how deeply I need Him, and how radically I will need to rely on Him in order to stay true to my faith over the next five years. It's becoming clear to me that if I want to be happy and at peace, I'm going to need to put down my own will, even in medical school. I'm going to need to be still and listen to the One Who not only sustains my life, but gives it meaning and purpose.
Some of the challenges awaiting me are ones I haven't directly confronted before - most explicitly, challenges to Catholic teaching about the sanctity of life and the meaning of human sexuality. But I'm realizing that even in medical school, many of the challenges are the same as they were in JVC. There is still the challenge to live simply and act justly. Still the challenge to bear witness to an authentic Christian faith in the midst of a secular society. Still the challenge to see and love Christ in others. Still the challenge to serve.
And there is still the sure and constant knowledge that my deepest happiness is bound up inextricably in God's desire that I find the whole of my life and being in Him. That's true whether I'm in a DV shelter or a hospital. And in the end, I think that's good news - Good News even.
- 11:04 PM
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